Sunday, September 30, 2007

everything comes back in the end

My check engine light? It's on again. I'm glad it's not flashing, but I guess something really is wrong. Here I go again...

So I decided to play hookey from my life today. I am going to stay in and try to write something rather than going on a scheduled group trip to Philadelphia to go see the Rodin Museum and the Eastern State Penitentiary.

Why would I decide not to do something so fun, you ask? For the same reason I skipped Scott's 80s party last night. I am TIRED. I get really stressed out by being around people, I've discovered, and my recovery period is in direct proportion to how long I've been around them. Working a second job increases the stress level, because the time I would have to do things during the week is used up. I have to cram more leisure into what time I have left, which sometimes leaves me with a feeling of "Damn it, I have to have fun or else!" And, of course, all of the activities I choose for myself are optional. I forget that a lot.

It's funny that I should be so worn out by people. I've taken the Myers-Briggs test more than once and been told I was an extrovert, but time and again I do classic introvert moves, like hibernate when I get stressed out. (The definition of extrovert/introvert we are working with is that an extrovert is energized by being with people and an introvert is drained by it.) I think I am both. When I am with people, I perk up and get involved in the group, but it takes a lot out of me and I have to balance it out with time alone to recharge. Unfortunately it means I miss out on things I wish I could do in the name of my sanity. I guess that's a draw - I get to not be crazy, but I'm not out having fun every minute of every day. Huh.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Simply adjust your definition. Extroverts have greater endurance in social situations. Introverts has little tolerance. It is odd how a species described has 'social' can have such trouble being so.

9/30/2007 03:59:00 PM  
Blogger bibliofilly said...

Meh, I'm not that concerned about the label. I did find a new term, too - "ambivert." According to good ol' Wikipedia, "An ambivert is normally comfortable with groups and enjoys social interaction, but also relishes time alone and away from the crowd."

10/01/2007 08:53:00 AM  

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